Fe Fi Fo Ho

So the other night i am talking to a dancer that works for the competition and she is going on telling me how she smacked the Fe Fi Fo Ho. I stopped for a second and knew immediately who this person was. She is 6'0 without heels, and with stripper shoes she is easily 6'8" so the name fits perfectly. She is a total self centered bitch that thinks she is "all that" and doesn't realise that she is a washed up whore. To be a whore is one thing, to be a washed up whore is altogether different. So the Fe Fi Fo Ho continues to win friends and influence people. I would have to say the funnies part about this particular person is a lot of men think she is transgendered. Does that mean you are hot? I am thinking... I will keep my thoughts to myself on this one. She could be attractive if her personality weren't so shitty. She will walk up to you every day telling you how she is going to die and ramble to you for hours about how pathetic and miserable she is. The second you ever say anything about yourself she glances at you with a curt look, says "I don't care" and walks off.  I am told none of the bartenders/managers on the block can manage her or keep  her in line, yet i never had that problem when she worked for me. 

I am tired of one thing on the block. Nearly every freakin dancer tries to tell me and convince me they are the biggest moneymaker on the block etc. The other day one girl works her first shift with me. Does a $60 dance and the second the customer pays for it she has her hand out. I said what? she said give me my money, i looked at her and laughed in her face. I said you don't get paid immediately, you claim to being a dancer for over 7 years and you have yet to figure out how it works? I am unsure if i am more impressed with her audacity or ignorance.  She started to pitch a fit,  and told me hers was the best ass in the French Quarter, to which i laughed and told her, "Wow Really? I hear that daily from different girls" i then pointed to the front door and told her to have a nice night and get out of my bar. 

The two biggest moneymakers I have worked with are one transgendered i called Sideburn Sue in a previous post, and then another short lil "healthy" Hispanic looking dancer. The heavy set one is amazing with people. I am unsure if its her soft voice or maybe her calm demeanor but she can walk up to ANY customer and within 5 minutes of talking to him have a dance and then some.  I enjoy her working my shifts because i know i will make some money.

Customers asking me if i think they are idiots is seldom a good sign for them.

Thursday night, i had this total pretentious prick in the bar bragging about how much money he has etc. Well 3 girls went up to him and he denied them all, then "Sideburn Sue" went up to him and some how cracked his safe open. Within 10 seconds he bought her a $27.00 drink and 5 minutes later a $280.00 dance. After he agreed to the dance i had to get him to sign his credit card receipt, give his fingerprint, take his photo etc. When i went to him to get him to sign the receipt he started being a real prick. He looks at me says "Do I look stupid to you?" to which i bit my tongue and assured him that the fact that he was going upstairs with a man he thought was a woman didn't influence my opinion of him at all. He asked what i would do if he refused to sign it, i said not too much apparently and about 10 seconds before i was going to kick him out the door she signed, then gave his thumbprint and i snapped his picture. After his dance he wouldn't leave, so the girls got him to spend more money, 2 rounds of drinks and he was at $91.00 so he closed out his CC again. Then he wanted a VIP with the 2 girls i mentioned earlier together, Sideburn Sue and the Heavier one. I told him it would be $560 he said no. after about 45 minutes to an hour of the girls wrangling him he decided on 2 $120.00 dances. well the 45 mins of wrangling and drinking put him at about $490.00. Before the dance both girls insisted on $100 tip for each of them and $100 for me. So they take him to the ATM and he withdraws $200 gives each girl her share. Well they went ape shit and started badgering him till he went to the ATM again. This time was for my tip. They weren't going to do anything with/for him till he tipped me. He comes to the bar gives me a $20 note and walks away. The girls looked at me and said they were going to get the rest during the dance. After them postponing his dance for 5-10 mins and hearing him getting annoyed i told them to forget about it. Once the dance was over they managed to get another $40 from him for me, so these 2 girls definitely rock. They shortly ended their shifts after this dance and headed home, the guy was still there wanting a VIP from another of the girls, he went to throw it on his CC and i ran it and it was declined. So she took him over to the ATM and he tried n tried to get money from it, she then saw a receipt on the floor and it was his. he was $-198.00 at that moment. So we both knew it wasn't going to happen, he went in and out of the club another 5 times or so, and on each reentry he had me run his card to see if it would work yet.

NO SIR I DO NOT THINK YOU ARE AN IDIOT AT ALL, you spent a total of over $900 on a guy and a girl and called the guy a Classy Woman at the end of the night. YOU SIR ARE A TOTAL MORON! With your Wedding ring and negative bank account I hope your wife is PROUD!