Fe Fi Fo Go

I finally had enough of the Fe Fi Fo Ho, this bitch is fuckin psychotic. Just a really fucked up whore that hasn't a clue on how to deal with people. She has every disease known to man one week or another. The issues range from Lupus Erythematosus, Stroke, Blindness, the Inability to Walk, HIV, AIDS, Gonoherpasyphalaids, the list is endless. If she hears a new term or disease you can be sure for the next week she will use it as much as possible. When she heard the term resignation, i think she told me 10 times "It is time, i am giving my resignation!" Too bad the bitch didn't mean it. She is a fuckin nutter. One guy the other night was asking about her and said "You know, the girl with the Flapjack Titties." This is the most Narcissistic psychopath i have ever run across. She claims to be the highest paid hooker in New Orleans, HA! She is a pathetic joke of humanity and should have been the Poster Child for planned parenthood! The funniest part about this "Gem" is that 70% of the guys that enter the club and know TS's work here think she is a he. She is also a Rat, Claims to have CI number, claims to have ratted out dirty cops etc. Tried to invent shit on me when i fired her from my shift. Boys and Girls, i suggest you steer clear of the Fe Fi Fo Ho.

Mexicant

So one night working in a club we have this Mexicant walk in. He immediately pulls his little Chihuahua out and scares the girls and boys. I let it go for a few minutes to see how the Girls will handle it. Eventially I tell him its time for him to leave. Now my Mexicant isnt fluent by any means but he got the idea, turned to me, said Fuck You and continued to drink his beer. I then said No It is time for you to go. He ignored me so my door man said it is time for you to go in some broken Mexicant Spanish. He ignored him as well. At this point I am finished with his bullshit so i move the chair that is between him and the door out of the way, I grab one side of him, my Ooompah Loompah Pit Bull grabs the other side and we procede to "Gingerly" escort him to the door. When we have him immitating Aero Mexico as he launches across the sidewalk, we aim for the pole outside the door but accidentally allow him to touch down in the garbage can. He gets up and hums a beer bottle at me like a MLB Pitcher, that thing was traveling well over 98MPH. This guy missed his calling! The bottle explodes on the wall behind me and i feel a sliver cut me, so i decide "Fuck This" and I go after him, he starts to attempt to bow up to me when I throw a Right Jab that sends him to the ground. He then gets up and starts to run away but for some reason turns around, I guess he likes getting punched in the face, so i oblige his fettish and land another one on him, he hits the ground again, he grabs my leg and twists my ankle so i fall over. Well that pissed me off so i jumped up and started kicking him in the face, i give him a second to get back up as i know he loves my punches, so when he gets up he goes to swing at me, i block it his eyes get big and i punch him again, he goes back to the ground, grabs my foot again and i fall again, now i am looking like a drunken Irishman on St. Paddys day at this point, i was ok to leave it there till i realised i fell in the French Quarter gumbo that is the funk in the gutters of the street. So i get up and really pissed this time start wailing on him, my doorman gets a kick or two in and as i am about to finish him off these 3 street walkers start talking to him saying "Little Man I dont know what you did but whatever it was it must have been fucked up because these are 2 of the coolest guys on the block, you better go before they really hurt you" So i let the lil Mexicant up and he backs off, and we think its over. I return to the club. An hour passes and my doorman says hey he is there, i look out he is peeping around the corner at us. He does this for about 20-30 minutes trying to convince any Mexican that walks by him to help him out, they all refused. I look up and see him walking towards the door of the club alone, now i have a lot of things going through my head at this point, such as WTF this guy is a total moron, he just had his ass kicked there is no way he is coming back for more, he has something else going on, so my doorman and I go inside the club to wait. After waiting for what seemed like 10 minutes i see him rushing around the car parked on the street with his hand in his back like he is reaching for a gun, i slam the club door shut and throw the deadbolt. He beats on the door for a second or two and leaves. Later that evening we see a few guys we know that told us he definately had a gun. So goes another day in Paradise!

Bloody Nikki

What do you get when you take a 6'1" transgendered guy with a potbelly and really horrible cosmetic procedures? Yes! Bloody Nikki. This bitch is disgusting. Firstly It has HIV, and some kind of silicone injections in his hips that was rejected so it looks like a cottage cheese factory gone bad, and an upper lip with so much collagen in it i think Goodyear is stamped on his inner lip. He totally freaks out when someone calls him a boy, i dont get why afterall he is a he. I will call a TS she if i have any respect for them but this boy is just a pain in the ass, not to mention dangerous. Why the name Bloody Nikki you ask, well one day he is in the back with a guy giving him head apparently and the guy screams, and Nikki comes out with his face covered in blood. Can you believe the guy asked for a REFUND? This big ugly thing finds it fun to get a thug in the back convincing them he is a she only to let them know right as the dance is ending that he has a dick. Really classy let me tell you. So if you are ever in the Stripper Graveyard and see a pale black boy with horrible torpedo titties pointing right and left and a pot belly thats Bloody Nikki, give him my regards, tell him he looks like a Boy.